STUFF – hullo

what can I say?

whose voices am I consuming as I say

why can I not say

when you can

but yet you want their authentic voices

what I tell you cannot be trusted

that’s what you say

as if you had heard the authentic

yourself

then why do you need me to reveal it to you

if you know what it should look like?

Professor Wiebe Bijker, Chair of the Department of Technology and Society Studies at the University of Maastricht, Netherlands, is “visiting” my class during the month of March. He will be “meeting” us at http://www.cyberdiva.org/729, where members from my Grad class (COMS 729) as well as some of my Phd advisees and my NGO collaborators from Hyderabad India will engage him in discussion about his work in “Social Construction of Technology (“SCOT”) for which he is widely known.

Dr. Bijker’s website is at

http://137.120.191.229/public/websites/bijkernieuw/

It is a closed discussion with my class in the context of their coursework, of course.

so I tried out the wii for the first time ever.

interesting

and so in this moment there is clarity!

and even got to share it with A on google chat.

She’s still there I see and so is L – but its time for me to sleep…

g’night

it goes…

మేము ఇక్కడనుంచి 9 మంది రాజవోలు వర్క్షాప్పుకు వెళ్ళాము…

so now I have to piece together based on all these notes since I cant seem to locate the tapes…

it must have happened around the time I fell asleep last night

i woke up this morning having no rational explanation for my bout of panic in my sleep

but i met L online and she told me

amidst “talk” of goats and cows…

it must have happened around the time I fell asleep last night i thought

but why would his passing soul have touched me as he left this world, i wonder(ed)

why would her grief have touched me unknown to me

as i slept her dupatta lying within arms reach

a piece of her life’s work in connecting to their weaving lives…

i hardly know her my conscious mind tells me

even though i have known her even before I met her for years as A has been telling me of how she nurtured her

[as i know i should have had i been within without distance s]

i knew her through A’s stories the woman who knew how they weaved and dyed – who designed through cultural memories

and contexts

i met her only a couple years ago – but i knew her long long ago – in her desire to re-connect

aesthetically

practically

we knew each other and she was my mentor too

so of course her pain is mine

and he touched me as he left – obligating me to be in her circle of support

leaving her in the care of all those around her

it is strange now to think of their living room and kitchen without him

that when I next visit her to talk about her weavers and her designs as the recipes for natural dyes – he will not be around
to joke and make us coffee

I knew him.

in a moment we all connected – and in a moment he is gone.

So A says I shouldnt go towards ruminants – should examine automobiles instead….

sigh…